Character
by SirenAlpha
Summary: Megumi told Kaoru to pull herself together after Shishio's defeat. Kaoru has every intention of doing this, but it's not for Kenshin. She's going back to her old habits and going to train to become the master of Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. AU in regards to the Jinchuu arc.
1. Chapter 1

I was really disappointed with the way Kaoru was treated towards the end of the manga. I know it's Kenshin's story, but she's still a main character. She did practically nothing after her fight with Kamatari. Towards this end, I've decided to fix that by giving Kaoru a character arc. It starts right after they arrive back in Tokyo and will continue past the end of the manga (not the five years bit, the ending just before that). I'm not cutting Kenshin short, but rather giving Kaoru a chance to become a fully fleshed out character.

Please enjoy!

* * *

Kaoru thought over Megumi's warning as they returned home. She had said to pull herself together for Kenshin. When she thought over the days leading up to her leaving for Kyoto, she realized she did need to pull herself together. It wouldn't be for Kenshin though. Megumi's words and her fight with the Juppon Gatana member had brought a number of things to her attention.

She was happy to have Kenshin, Yahiko, and Sano living with her, but she had let them become her protectors. She was regretting allowing that severely. She'd realized she'd grown a little soft in her fight, and maybe if she'd not let up on her training she might have been able to go along with Kenshin in the first place. Well, perhaps not, but she would have followed after him sooner.

She was going to go back to how it was before they lived with her. She needed her skills, and she needed to be prepared in case anything happened again. It was time for her to become the master of Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. She was mentally preparing herself and found that she was excited. She enjoyed teaching, but it was time to improve again. That was her favorite part of kendo, and in that way she was no different than Yahiko. She wouldn't lessen Yahiko's training, but she was no longer going to neglect her own.

Kaoru woke up on their first day back in Tokyo earlier than she had in a while. She automatically went straight to her chores, working quickly and efficiently, not caring that Yahiko could help her. She mentally planned out making repairs to areas of the dojo as she cleaned. She almost began to make breakfast before realizing that Kenshin was probably better suited for it.

"You're up early," she heard Kenshin say.

"I've decided to get back into my old habits," she said with a smile, "Then I remembered that it was probably better that you cook."

"If you think so," he said as he joined her in the kitchen. She watched as his eyes flicked over her outfit and knew that he had noticed she wasn't in kimono. "Yahiko isn't up yet," he told her.

"I know, but that doesn't matter. I'm not up to teach him," she said with a shrug.

"Then what are you up for, if you don't mind me asking?" he asked, tilting his head slightly.

"I think it's time for me to become a master of Kamiya Kasshin Ryu," she said, watching him for his reaction.

He showed only the slightest hint of surprise. "You and Yahiko aren't the only swordsmen that live here," she said, not keeping all of the teasing out of her tone.

"No, we certainly aren't," he said before turning to begin breakfast.

Kaoru let him be and headed for the dojo. She pulled out a bokken and began a kata. She wanted to know she had everything down perfectly before she began moving on. She became more and more disappointed at the end of each kata. She was slower than she had been before and she could feel the tiredness seeping into her much earlier than it used to. She allowed herself to accept her frustration and grunted. She placed her hands on her hips, bokken still in her hand, and waited for her frustration to pass. All she had to do to fix this was to continue and get better.

"Oi, Ugly!" Yahiko called out.

Kaoru whirled around, her irritation rising though she'd been trying to calm it. She snapped, "What?"

"Breakfast," he said as if that were obvious.

"I'm coming," she told him. He left immediately. She put away her bokken and headed over to the dining area and joined the rest of them at the table.

"Morning," she greeted as she sat down, receiving only nods from the others. Kaoru was glad the food was good because she was hungry and she would have had to force herself to eat her own cooking otherwise. She felt better now that she was taking a break.

"Hey, Kenshin," Yahiko piped up suddenly.

"Yes, Yahiko?" he asked, giving the boy his full attention.

"Will you train with me now?" he asked, looking hopeful.

For a second, Kaoru thought Kenshin looked like he would concede and agree to train with Yahiko. She interrupted before that could happen. "No," Kaoru said calmly, knowing that she needed to do this to keep with her decision.

"What!?" Yahiko said giving her a half surprised half angry look.

"I said no. In order to train with Kenshin, you'll need to get through me," she said firmly, finishing another bite of her meal.

"What for? I beat a member of the Juppon Gatana on my own. You'll be too easy," he complained.

"I beat one as well, remember? If you think it's so easy to beat me then you'll have to prove it," she said with the beginnings of a smirk. This was a good opportunity to bring down Yahiko's ego to normal levels. She also needed to make sure for herself that it indeed wasn't too easy to bring her down.

"Then let's do it now!" he said, slapping a hand down on the table and getting halfway to his feet.

"You'll wait until I'm done digesting," she told him sternly then ate another bite.

Yahiko growled but sat back down at the table. "I have not seen you fight," Kenshin noted abruptly.

"Shouldn't be too much to see," Sano said with a shrug before gulping down more food.

"Hey!" Yahiko shouted angrily.

"You can be put next on the list," Kaoru warned him.

"Yeah, yeah," Sano said, returning to her food.

Kaoru frowned, suddenly feeling like she'd just realized that Sano had no respect for her as a fighter. He gave some respect to Yahiko even though he was her pupil. She remembered an old feeling and swallowed it down.

"Are you alright, Kaoru-dono?" Kenshin asked, talking to her over Sano and Yahiko's bickering.

"I'm fine," she said, deciding she wasn't hungry any longer, "Be ready in twenty minutes Yahiko."

"I will be!" he told her before returning to his argument with Sano.

She left, heading back to the dojo to begin preparing. She was ready to test herself against Yahiko, prepared to fight fully against him if necessary, when he walked in at the time they'd agreed upon. Without a word, she entered a starting stance. Kenshin and Sano filed into the dojo silently as Yahiko quickly prepared to fight her.

"Let's do this," he said as soon as he was ready.

She let him make the first attack. She dodged his first few attacks, allowing him to set the pace. She began to block and counter, feeling her body react with old muscle memory as well as learning how Yahiko fought from a new perspective. She began to speed the pace, taking the edge in the match. He was good, but she was confident she was better. She began to strike harder, scope out openings, and soon enough, she landed a hard hit to his shoulder.

He retreated several paces after the hit. She noticed that he was panting but was surprised to not find herself out of breath even though she had been practicing earlier. She took the offense, striking at him whenever she thought she could break his defense, keeping him from attacking her in response. She was proud of him even when she landed a hit to his side. She stopped when she heard him gasping for breath as she'd knocked the wind out of him.

"I think that's enough to prove my point," she said, tucking her bokken into her belt.

"I'm not finished," he croaked out as soon as he had enough air to speak.

"It's enough for today, Yahiko. You won't beat me," she told him gently, "You did well."

"You're pretty good, Jo-chan," Sano said then shrugged, "for a girl."

"I'm good for a swordsman or I'm not good at all," she snapped at him, not willing to take any verbal snipes in her moment of victory.

"Relax, it's a compliment," Sano said gently, motioning for her to calm down with his good hand.

"Kaoru-dono does not see it as a compliment," Kenshin said to him though he was looking at her.

"Thanks Kenshin," she said harshly, "I really needed your help on that."

"Oro?" he said, confused, "Did I say something wrong?"

"Please leave so we can train," she said, "I think there are a few things Yahiko and I need to cover in light of recent events."

"Alright, alright," Sano said, standing up, "Let's go, Kenshin."

He placed a hand on the shorter man's shoulder, and they both left. "What do we need to cover?" Yahiko asked once they were gone.

"I'm stepping up the rigor of our sparring," she announced to him, "Also, the times of our practicing may have to change."

"What, why?" he asked, giving her a lost look.

"I'm going to take up a job at the Akebeko. I need to start making more money again if we're all going to be living here. I also need time to train for becoming a master of Kamiya Kasshin Ryu," she explained to him simply.

"You're going to become a master?" he asked; hope suddenly springing into his tone, "Does that mean I get to become adjutant master?"

"Yahiko, to be honest, I am impressed with your improvement and talent," she sighed before continuing, "but I don't think you're ready to become an adjutant master yet. We need to talk about a lot of things before that can happen. There's a philosophy that goes along with this style."

"I know that," he said, a whine edging his words.

"Good, then let's get back to practicing," she said with a smile, "Time for katas."

"Yes," he bemoaned, taking up a stance and beginning.

Kaoru usually would watch him to make sure he was doing everything right and correct his mistakes, but she decided that he was good enough for her time to be more wisely spent. She distanced herself from him and began to practice the more advanced katas she hadn't fit in before breakfast. She told herself she would keep an eye on Yahiko as he practiced, but her entire focus went into performing the motions of her kata.

When she finished, she was breathing harder than she expected and once again was disappointed that she'd gotten out of shape. "Woah," she heard Yahiko half whisper, "am I going to learn to do that?"

"I know Kamiya Kasshin Ryu is no Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu, but it does have something to it," she said, feeling better having said that. She then winced when she realized that she was comparing the style her father had created to protect lives to the style created to kill many practically at once. Kenshin was using it to protect, but that hadn't been what it had always been used for.

"Is that it for today?" he asked.

"Yes, for kendo. Do you want to come with me to visit the Akabeko?" she asked as she prepared to put her bokken away.

"Sure," he said, preparing to leave as well.

"Kenshin! Sano!" she called out as she left the dojo, "Yahiko and I are headed to the Akebeko!"

"Why? Are you getting food?" Sano asked, popping his head out from behind a screen.

"No, we're going to see if they have any jobs available," she said sourly, crossing her arms.

"Alright, good luck," he said, no longer interested now that he knew food wasn't involved.

"We'll be here, Kaoru-dono," Kenshin called to her from where he was doing laundry.

"See you later!" Yahiko called out as he joined Kaoru.

"Bye," she called out to the two men as they left, shutting the gate behind them.

"Think they'll really have a job for us?" Yahiko asked as they began walking.

"I don't know, but we'd better check before saying anything for sure," Kaoru said before taking the lead.

Yahiko was given his job back upon his return. Tae found odds and ends for Kaoru to do. She was alright with that, glad to be making money even if she had to sit through Tae's lecture about looking like a woman. She was perfectly fine with dressing femininely; she just didn't like changing all the time. It wasn't like she was a waitress who was working directly with the customers anyways. She and Yahiko returned home in time for dinner.

"Welcome back," Kenshin greeted as they entered the dining area, Yahiko plodding heavily and looking tired.

"What happened to you?" Sano asked, watching Yahiko with wary eyes.

"Nothing, let's eat, I'm hungry," he said, taking a seat at the table.

Kaoru took her usual seat, and Kenshin served, receiving the usual round of thanks. They ate with Sano and Yahiko providing most of the noise and chatter. Kaoru looked up from her food every once in a while to see that Kenshin was looking at her. She gave him a smile once when she caught him, and he gave her a small smile in return. She began cleaning up when their meal was finished, and then headed back to the dojo. She had done a lot that day, but she wanted to do more. She didn't want to go back to how she was before Kyoto.

She almost jumped when she heard the door slide open, but she knew it was Kenshin. "Is something wrong, Kenshin?" she asked, turning around to face him.

"No, there's nothing wrong," he said, shutting the door behind himself, "I thought that if Kaoru-dono would not allow Yahiko to train with me, perhaps she would let me train with her."

"You want to train with me?" she asked, wondering what made him change his mind, "You told me you wouldn't."

"That I did, but you cannot go to Maekawa's dojo every day to become a master," he explained, "I thought it would be better if I let you train with me."

"Thank you, Kenshin," she said with a smile, grabbing her bokken. She was a little surprised to see him pick up an extra bokken, but she didn't ask him about it. She took a starting stance, trying not to feel too excited now that she was finally getting her chance to face Kenshin. It was one thing to see and know he was strong, and another to face him and know he was strong.

When he didn't begin an attack for several moments, she did. She could tell almost instantaneously that she wasn't going to win, even if he had only blocked her bokken. She decided to enjoy the opportunity anyways and fought against him with all her might. She felt more confident in her abilities than she had in the morning, even if he never attacked. She could work on that later, though, because she did need to be able to keep up with her defense.

She finished when the dojo became too dark, and she was too tired to carry on. Kenshin put away the bokken he had used, and she followed his lead. "That was good," she said to him as they left, "Reminded me of old times."

"Oro?" he said, confused, "Old times?"

"Yes, Yahiko's the first person I've ever really trained with who's been smaller than me," she said with a shrug.

"Who did you train with then?" he asked, keeping his polite tone even though he was prying a little more than usual.

"Older boys, sometimes men," she said with a shrug, "even the ones my own age were bigger than me. Yahiko's actually the first student here to be significantly younger than me."

She glanced over at him to see his eyebrows raised. "Don't look so surprised, who else was I supposed to train with?" she asked.

"I don't know," he said with a nod in deference towards her "I know little of what this dojo was like before I arrived."

"It was mostly people who knew and respected my father, not too many young ones. Goodnight Kenshin," she said before turning away for her room. She readied for bed quickly and fell asleep easily, feeling more content than she had in a while.

* * *

I really like Kaoru, and I think she's a really strong character. I also think that she could make a really great partner for Kenshin, and much of her personifies the themes of the series. However, she got a hell of a short stick from the series. She starts off prepared to fight and die for her dojo then ends up letting Kenshin, Sano, and Yahiko do it for her. Despite Watsuki's intentions, he turned her into a damsel. I'm very unhappy about that, and that she has the least amount of back story out of any major character. This story will hopefully fix that, and I genuinely think that this could turn out fantastically.

I've also decided to have Kenshin speak not in a polite Japanese manner, but a polite English manner. I know English isn't that polite of a language, but I'm writing in English. I'm going to try and cut out the Japanese as much as I can because really, I write in English. I hope this doesn't bother anyone. Names, nicknames, and titles all sort of get a pass though (and Kenshin's 'oro').

This story is going to be rather long, but the chapters probably will never be longer than this one. I'm going to start with updating every two weeks and see if that works out for me. Please review!

Seriously, review. I need someone else's thoughts on this.


	2. Chapter 2

I'm surprised this story got as much positive attention as it did. Hopefully this will meet expectations. Please enjoy!

* * *

Kaoru woke in the morning feeling sore practically everywhere. Had she been younger she would have complained, but she wasn't going to now. She was going to push past the soreness the same as she had before. She felt rather good about the soreness. She was getting somewhere. She got up immediately and finished her chores so that they'd be out of the way.

She met Kenshin as he was on his way to the kitchen, and she on her way to the dojo. They nodded to each other in greeting and passed without a word. She started off slowly with her katas and got a little farther than the day before when Yahiko yelled at her to come to breakfast. The meal was its usual affair, and afterwards she trained Yahiko. He was getting better, and she knew she needed to find time to teach him the philosophy behind Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. Knowing it was the sword that protects wouldn't be enough.

Both she and her student returned to the Akabeko to work some more. Kaoru was glad to be receiving the pay. She hadn't made any money while in Kyoto, and she had spent quite a bit on travelling. She would have to be careful with her savings in order to get the repair work she needed done before winter. After dinner, Kenshin joined her in the dojo.

"Glad to be back home, Kaoru-dono?" he asked as he chose a bokken.

"Yes, why?" she asked, choosing not to prepare herself in case this conversation went anywhere.

"You're feeling better than you were yesterday, that you are," he told her with a small smile.

She knew that he'd figured that out by reading her ki. It was easy at times to forget that he could do that. She decided just to grace him with an answer he didn't ask for. "Yes, I'm feeling better. Sparring with you reminds me of sparring with my father," she admitted with a shrug. She smiled at the memories she had of sparring and training with her father. It seemed so long ago.

"Oro? I remind you of your father?" Kenshin asked, looking surprised, "I didn't think I was that old."

"It's not because of your age," she told him, holding back a giggle at his silliness, "My father always seemed unbeatable when I sparred with him, and I certainly can't beat you."

He gave her a little smile, "You're more understanding of your strength than Yahiko."

"Yes, and I've come to realize that the strength I have isn't enough," she said, rolling her shoulders.

"Enough for what, Kaoru-dono?" he asked.

She decided not to give him an answer. She held up her bokken, and he was immediately in a stance. Yesterday, she had fought at her full strength to push herself and test herself against his strength. Now, she was studying how Kenshin moved. She couldn't tell that he'd severely injured himself a month previous. She hoped he wasn't overexerting himself.

She attempted to goad him into striking against her. She needed experience in defending as much as she needed experience in attacking. She backed off her attacks, drew away from him, making sure to keep her defenses up. He followed her, keeping her within distance, but he never attacked. It was more frustrating to have him refuse to attack than it was to never hit.

She was a little irritated, though she had expected that outcome, and exhausted and panting by the end of their bout. Drawing close and moving away repeatedly had taken more energy than she'd realized. "You move well," Kenshin noted as they were setting aside their bokkens.

"Thanks," she said, but was unable to really put any sincerity into it. He could mean 'for a girl' just like Sano did, and that was nothing to be proud of. She was the only girl. She was both the worst and the best if no one treated her or saw her as a swordsman.

"Goodnight, Kenshin," she said, giving him a small smile as she headed for her bedroom.

"Goodnight, Kaoru-dono."

* * *

The following day, after breakfast, she asked Yahiko to sit with her in the dojo. "What are we doing?" he asked warily as he sat down in front of her.

"We're going to discuss the philosophy behind Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. I think I may have put this off for too long, but better now than even later," she explained with a sigh.

"It's the sword that protects life," he said with a shrug, "What else is there to it?"

"Much more," she said, "What is life?"

"Uh," he said, stalling and scratching the back of his head, "It's the thing that keeps us alive?"

"What keeps us alive?" she asked.

"Life?" he repeated, sounding unsure.

"Is that a question or an answer?" she asked in return.

"Life keeps us alive, our heart beats, our thoughts, our feelings, what we do, it's our life," he said sounding both irritated and confused, "Is this a trick question?"

"No, I just wanted to make sure you had a definition for life," she said with a small smile.

"Alright, I do, now what about it?" he asked, grumpily crossing his arms.

"Do people have a right to their lives?" she asked, ignoring his attitude.

"Yeah," he said immediately without hesitation.

"Does anyone not deserve the right to their life?" she asked, watching him for his response.

"What do you mean?" he asked, holding out a hand, "I thought I just answered that."

"Let me rephrase it then. Does anyone deserve to be killed?" she asked, narrowing her eyes, hoping he understood the importance of the question.

He hesitated. He fidgeted under her gaze, but didn't look away. "I guess, if they're really bad-"

"You said people have a right to their lives," she interrupted harshly, "What difference does it make if they're bad?"

"I mean," he said then stopped for a moment, clearly confused about what he believed in, "Only if they're really bad, like Shishio, or if they've murdered-"

"Like Kenshin," she said quietly. She watched as Yahiko's eyes widened in horror.

"No way!" he shouted, lurching forward, "Kenshin's a good guy."

"But he's killed people, so by your own admission he deserves to be killed. Go kill him," she said, nodding towards the doors.

"No!" he said, rearing back, "I could never!"

"Exactly," she said with a smile.

"What!?" he asked, calming down but still incredibly confused.

"Under your definition of bad, Kenshin is bad. You could never kill him though. You believe he is good even if he has killed," she explained slowly, "No matter how you define bad, every bad person is going to have something good about them. No one is purely good nor purely bad. What does this tell you?"

"I…" he stared at her for several moments before dropping his head, "I don't know."

"It tells you that there's always a reason to not kill someone. You have to find it in every person, and it must outweigh all of the reasons to kill them," she told him firmly, "Do you understand?"

"I don't know," he repeated.

"However it pains you to hear this, you're not alone in this struggle. Kenshin has this problem as well; it's why he still believes a hitokiri resides in his heart. While he may be one of the most skilled swordsmen in the country, he isn't always the strongest in moral conviction. He has had trouble at times finding a reason in a person to not kill them," she informed him.

She knew he wouldn't like hearing bad things about his role model and idol, but it was important for him to realize that Kenshin was a person. Seeing him without his faults did nothing for either of them.

"We can talk more later," she told him gently.

He looked up at her, clearly upset about the conversation. "We should go to work," he said, getting to his feet.

"If you're alright with that," she said as she stood.

They left in a matter of minutes. Work was fine for Kaoru, but Yahiko was still clearly thinking hard on their conversation. He was distracted from his work, but she was careful to pick up his slack. They returned home to an unusually quiet dinner. Even Sano noticed something was up. Yahiko left dinner and went to bed earlier than he usually did, mumbling something about thinking as he left.

"What's up with him?" Sano asked, looking to Kaoru.

"We discussed some of the philosophy behind Kamiya Kasshin Ryu, and I used a rather extreme example to prove a point. I wanted him to really think about it, and it's worked," she told them with a shrug.

"What example did you use?" Kenshin asked.

"You," she said, pointing at Kenshin's nose.

"Oro? Me?" he asked, looking confused.

"Yes, I lead Yahiko into saying that you deserve to have your life taken from you for killing," she explained.

"What!?" Sano and Kenshin asked at the same time. They both looked shocked, and Kenshin had completely passed using 'oro'.

"Allow me to explain," she said, making a calming motion, "We were talking about the right to life and who deserves it. Yahiko labeled murdering as bad and something worth a death penalty, but labeled you as good and that you shouldn't be killed. You can't pick and choose lives like that."

"And so no one should be killed," Kenshin added as a conclusion, assured by her words.

"Yes, exactly," she said with a nod.

There was silence for a moment. "I must admit, it is unsettling to know that a child condemned me to death," Kenshin said, pensively staring at his food.

"He did it unintentionally. He was very adamant that he hadn't, but he condemned a number of people to death by his way of thinking," she shrugged, serving herself a little more now that Yahiko wasn't taking all the food, "There are better, more appropriate punishments than execution."

"This philosophy sounds really serious," Sano commented.

"It is. The katana, bokken, and shinai are all tools even though we usually consider them weapons. What's most important is the philosophy driving the wielder," she said with a shrug, remembering the times her father had talked about such serious topics. There was a lot she felt she couldn't say without him here.

"Did you handle it the same way Yahiko did when you learned?" Sano asked. She realized it was the first time he'd ever asked her about her life before all of them, but knew he probably hadn't realized it.

"Yes, I had my father to prepare me, and this is the easy part," she answered with a nod.

"You mean it gets worse?" he asked, surprised.

"No, not worse, harder," she said, looking down to her food. She knew all of the philosophy behind her chosen style, and she knew where her frustration and weakness lay. She glanced up to see Kenshin watching her with intense eyes, trying to read away.

"But you're still just the adjutant master, is there any way for you to become master without, you know, a master to teach you?" Sano asked, then glanced back and forth between the two swordsmen he was sitting with, "That's how learning a style works, right?"

Kenshin looked to Kaoru, and Sano followed his lead. "Yes, usually, but he, my father, left behind instructions for me," she said, swallowing down the sadness she felt every time she thought about the book filled with his writing.

"Oh," he said, not knowing what to say anymore.

"I'll just clean up," she said, beginning to gather the dishes and not wanting to discuss anything more, "I'm not going to spar tonight, Kenshin."

Kenshin nodded and began to help her collect dishes. "I'll be off then," Sano said, getting to his feet, "I'll see you later."

"You're helping out the next time you eat here," she warned him, but he only waved goodbye and left.

She rolled her eyes and went back to her chore. Kenshin silently helped her. "You're not upset, are you?" she asked, suddenly feeling self-conscious about having used him, "That I used you as an example."

He shook his head, "You're his teacher and you know your style best. I was a good example for your purposes."

She sighed, pausing in her work. She couldn't really accept his words. She had received a number of harsh words thrown at her for her chosen lifestyle. It wasn't easy to hear that someone thought her life shouldn't be what it was or that she didn't deserve it or that it should be taken from her. "Are you sure?" she asked, watching him, "Please tell me."

He didn't stop cleaning the dishes. He didn't say anything for a moment. "You had good intentions Kaoru-dono," he said finally, "Some lessons are harsh, but nonetheless must be learned."

"I apologize anyways," she said, resuming her work, "I won't do it again."

"It's fine," he told her, "If my example helps teach others not to kill then it's alright."

She accepted his response, "Alright, thanks Kenshin."

"What are you thanking me for?" he asked, looking up at her with a clueless expression.

"For accepting my teaching methods, I guess," she said with a shrug and a smile.

"Your methods are certainly preferable to shishou's," he responded with a frown.

She couldn't help but chuckle. "That's not funny," he said, shaking his head.

"I think it is," she told him as she finished up with the dishes. She could see him smiling a little. They finished with the dishes quickly. "Goodnight, Kaoru-dono," he told her as they left the room.

"Goodnight, Kenshin," she responded before she turned towards her bedroom. She was ready to sleep and eager for morning.

* * *

Seeing as Kenshin and pretty much every other main male character in the series gets to go on about their principles, I thought I'd give Kaoru a chance to express hers. We're never told all the principles behind Kamiya Kasshin Ryu, but I'm certain that there's more to it than just a basic statement towards protecting lives. I'm going to cover more of the principles and philosophy behind it, but not all at once.

Please review!


	3. Chapter 3

Here is where we start getting into the Jinchuu arc, and start getting AU.

* * *

The rest of the week continued the daily pattern. Kaoru let up on philosophy after her first lecture, thinking that neither of them were really ready to continue, but she didn't let up on Yahiko's or her training. She couldn't speak for Yahiko, but she could feel strength returning to her body. She felt healthier and more content than she had in a long time. Her unsettled feelings since May hadn't been caused solely by Kenshin's leaving. She had cut down something important and loved in her life, and it was good to have kendo back fully.

An old uneasiness however had returned by the end of the week. She had gone back to wearing gi and hakama around rather than kimono for convenience. She was perfectly happy inside of her home, but she was much less so outside of the walls. She heard unflattering comments, but it was always the looks that were the real trouble, especially from the women. The men only gave her strange looks then moved on, as if she were only a child play acting. The older women scowled at her unabashedly, shaking their fingers at her. The middle age women rolled their eyes, shook their heads, and twittered behind their hands; probably about their own, better daughters. Then, the women her age or a little older just giggled as she passed, as if she were so silly for deciding to do something for herself, and remarking how at least their men were safe from her.

They had grated on her before, and they grated on her now. Once, when she had walked about with Kenshin to shop, she had wanted to blurt out and ask if he felt the same way about being in public with his hair and eyes and sakabatou. Was it why he seemed so reluctant to leave the dojo at times?

When the time rolled around to prepare for the celebration at the Akabeko, she decided to just put on a clean gi and hakama instead of a kimono just to spite them. She also took her bokken. If Yahiko could go around with a shinai on his back, she could go around with a bokken on her hip. She was irritated with the comments and looks, and this was her way of dealing with them. She'd go back to kimono some other day when looking like a swordsman no longer made her feel so much more confident and proud.

Yahiko and Sano hadn't noticed or cared that she had arrived in gi and hakama with a weapon, but Tae had taken issue with it. She tried once again to get Kaoru to see the benefits of wearing kimono and make up, with the implication that it was to get Kenshin to stay with her. She got Tae off her back while avoiding all of the reasons she wasn't doing as she suggested. She liked Kenshin, very much so, but she didn't want make up being the reason he stayed. She knew he wouldn't stay for it anyways. Tae could call being sweaty ugly or disgusting all she wanted, but she felt good when she sweated from working hard at kendo. It had nothing to do with how she looked. Make up couldn't compete with that.

Then, when she thought Kenshin had arrived, a large man with a missing hand entered the Akabeko, asking for the cheapest meal. Kenshin arrived as the man was leaving after finishing his meal. He didn't notice that she was in gi and hakama either, but he seemed to be distracted by something else. She didn't bother to ask him about it. She knew he wouldn't answer. Still, they celebrated for some time. Kaoru ate about as much as she could possibly stomach, but was light on the drink. She knew she didn't hold her drink that well, and she didn't like the taste of alcohol anyways. She, however, wasn't so careful with her student, and Yahiko ended up drunk while she'd been looking away.

They left the Akebeko sometime after the sun had gone down. Tae and Tsubame joined them on the group's stroll. Sano complained about having to carry around the drunken Yahiko, but everyone knew he wasn't really that upset. Kaoru went off the road with Tae and Tsubame into the tall grass to chase fireflies. She liked catching them to look at them up close then set them free. She had done the same to toads and frogs when she'd had time as a child. She glanced over to her boys at the edge of the road. Sano, Kenshin, and Yahiko had all taken a seat on the roadside. She gave them a smile and a wave before returning to catching fireflies.

Then, a boom rang out. They stopped chasing fireflies and returned the way they came, wondering what had happened. Kaoru grew concerned when she heard the fire bell. Then the police ran past, telling them that the Akabeko had taken a hit from an Armstrong cannon fired from Mt. Ueno. As soon as he heard that, Kenshin shouted for them to return to the Akabeko while beginning to run for the mountain. Sano and Yahiko yelled that they were coming as well. Kaoru followed after them immediately. Tae called for her to come back, but she ignored her. She noticed that Yahiko had dropped off sometime on the way there, but she'd managed to keep up, staying only a pace or two behind Sano. She was panting hard by the time they'd arrived.

A tree had been felled by the cannon's recoil. A man had held the cannon rather than a pedestal. The police had found a note that read 'Jinchuu'. Kenshin explained how the writer meant they would bring judgment even if heaven spared their target.

"He's after you, isn't he?" Kaoru had asked after the police had left them. She felt surprisingly calm for knowing that someone was after Kenshin and possessed an Armstrong canon.

It was the first she'd spoken since they'd arrived, and Sano and Kenshin almost looked surprised to see her there. "They, they are after me. One man alone can't get an Armstrong canon," he answered, also sounding calm for knowing someone wanted revenge on him. It wasn't the first time someone wanted him dead, though. He continued, "They're after me because I've received no punishment from heaven for my crimes."

"Kenshin-," Sano said.

"It's alright," he interrupted.

They were all silent for several moments.

"Let's go find Yahiko and go home," she said, looking back down the mountain.

They left the mountain, this time walking instead of running. They found Yahiko when they were almost back to the Akabeko. He looked sick and a little dejected. "Are you alright?" Kaoru asked, kneeling down in front of him.

"Yeah, I just drank a little too much," he said, running a hand through his hair and then over his face.

"Need any help?" Sano asked, and Kaoru looked behind her to see Kenshin and Sano standing to the sides of her.

"No, I'm fine. I was just waiting for you," he said, slowly getting to his feet. Kaoru was a little concerned because he hadn't been loud like he usually would be. She stood and, when he turned around, ran a hand over his head and down his neck, letting it rest between his shoulder blades. He looked up at her, but didn't shrug her off or tell her to move away. They all walked back to the Akabeko, and Kaoru left her hand on Yahiko's back.

She was horrified to see the restaurant in ruins, feeling a strong sense of sympathy for Tae. They remained for some time and talked to Tae, her father, and the police. They also negotiated that Tsubame would stay at the dojo the following night. Eventually, they had to leave. She noticed that Yahiko stuck close to her side as they walked back to the dojo. Despite feeling that she should ask him first, Kaoru wrapped her arm around his shoulders and pulled him a little closer. He looked up at her again, but still didn't tell her to move away.

"I'm going to bed," he mumbled as soon as they returned to the dojo.

"Alright," she said, removing her arm, "We'll see you in the morning."

He nodded and walked off to his room. "Are you sure he's alright, Kaoru-dono?" Kenshin asked, speaking up for the first time since the mountain. He'd studied the ruins rather than talked to anyone.

"He'll be fine if he isn't alright right now," Sano said with a shrug.

"I don't know. He seemed rather upset," she said, running a hand over her arm, "but I can talk with him tomorrow."

The two men nodded.

"We're also going to talk about this Jinchuu tomorrow, after we hear the police report," she said, giving them a hard look. She wasn't going to be kept out of the loop this time. Sano and Kenshin shared a look. "Don't even think about it."

"Think about what? We weren't thinking about anything," Sano said, shaking his head.

"Of course you weren't," she snapped, beginning to feel her temper, "In case you've forgotten, this is _my_ dojo, and those people, whoever they are, they're threatening _my_ friends."

"Kaoru-dono-"

"Don't," she interrupted, crossing her arms, "I want to know everything that's going on and everything that you're planning."

"Just calm down," Sano said, motioning for her settle.

"No, not until you promise that you're not going to hide anything from me," she said.

"Kaoru-dono" he began, making a placating gesture and trying to smile at her.

"You especially," she growled at him, "You're not walking off again without telling me anything."

He almost flinched at that, but she found it hard to care. "Fine, we'll talk about it all together tomorrow," Sano said grouchily, "We won't leave you out."

"Good," she said, taking a deep breath to try and calm herself. She caught Sano and Kenshin sharing another look, and she glared at both of them.

"I'm heading out," he announced, "I'll see you guys tomorrow."

They both watched as he left, shutting the gate behind him. She felt it when Kenshin's eyes returned to her. She slowly turned to face him, wondering what he wanted and not in the mood. "You're still upset that I left you," he said, looking her in the eyes.

"Why wouldn't I be?" she asked. She always hated it when people left her. "Are you still mad that I followed you to Kyoto?"

"I didn't want anyone to get involved," he told her, "I didn't want anyone to get hurt."

"And what if we didn't want you involved, Kenshin?" she asked, "What if we didn't want you to get hurt?"

She could see him clench his jaw. "Stopping Shishio was more important than that," he said, crossing his arms.

"Then you should have at least let us come with you and help you," she countered, frowning.

"No, I didn't want to see you there," he said, taking a step towards her, "It would've been best if you had stayed out of it."

"I couldn't have done that," she told him, "What would you have done without us with the Juppon Gatana? We can all fight, and we survived."

He looked down, shaking his head. "What if you hadn't?" he asked, "I was angry because I thought I wouldn't be able to keep you safe. I wanted you to stay here where you couldn't be hurt."

"Yeah, I might have been safer here, but that doesn't mean that it would have been the best decision or the right one," she said, taking a step forward.

"How could it not be?" he asked, his muscles tensed, and his hands in fists.

"I am not weak, Kenshin," she told him coldly, "You might be stronger than me, but I don't need your protection. It was my choice to follow you. I wanted to fight with you."

"What about Hiruma and Jin-e?" he asked.

"Special cases," she spat, her own hands curling into fists, "I can fight, Kenshin. I don't need you to look after me or look over me. I defeated Kamatari."

"That might not be enough," he said, shaking his head.

"Not enough?" she asked, stalking closer to him and baring her teeth, "Not enough! I've been doing kendo for as long as I can remember. I worked twice as hard as the best boy in the class just so I wouldn't get laughed at. I did that for years. Then, when my father left, I had to work even harder to earn money. Don't tell me it's not enough because if it wasn't enough I guarantee there wouldn't have been anything left of me for you to have saved."

He took a step back, "I didn't mean to upset you, Kaoru-dono."

"No! No, you didn't mean to, but you did it anyways!" she shouted, "Not intending it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt!"

He looked shock. He'd never born so much of her rage before. She had just dredged up a lot of old anger, and it wasn't going to settle away easily. He clearly had no idea what to say to her. "I'm going to bed," she said, containing her volume but not her anger, "I'll see you in the morning."

She turned away and stalked off to her bedroom. She was careful not to break the shoji even though all she wanted to do was slam it shut or break it into little pieces. She removed her bokken from her belt and quickly dressed for bed. Even though she was comfortable in her bed, she was too angry still to fall asleep. She fisted her hands in her hair and tried not to growl as memories of voices, even Kenshin's and Sano's, told her to stand aside, stand down, give up, give in, sit in the corner, and be a little damsel; silent, weak, and good for nothing. She fell asleep screaming at them 'I'd like to see you try and make me'.

* * *

I feel like at some points in her life, all Kaoru would've had would've been kendo. She probably would have used it to fight her loneliness even if Hiruma Kihei was there with her.

Also, I didn't like that Kenshin and Kaoru never fought in the series over anything. That seems like poor communication to me because even if you're fighting at least you're telling each other something. Not only that, Kaoru expresses anger several times over the series then Kenshin expresses anger at seeing her in Kyoto. They clearly have the capacity to be angry at one another and to have a fight, but they don't even talk about Kaoru following him to Kyoto. That doesn't sit right with me. They needed to have this argument.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and please review!


	4. Chapter 4

I keep going in depth on Kaoru's feelings, and I'm not sure if I like it or not. They're important, but I'm not quite sure how much is too much.

* * *

Kaoru woke tired and grumpy. She gave a frustrated sigh then got up and readied for the day. She did her chores, and when she passed Kenshin in the hall; he didn't say anything to her. She didn't say anything back and instead devoted herself to her kata with a fervency born of the embers of the previous day's anger. Yahiko called her to breakfast. When she sat down, Kenshin again said nothing so she didn't either. Yahiko shoveled his food into his mouth as if everything was alright, but she knew he had noticed. He kept glancing between the two of them.

She wouldn't presume to know what Kenshin was thinking. She wasn't sure what to do, they'd never fought before, but she wasn't in the wrong. She had told him what she needed him to understand, and he had to decide what to do with that information. Still, she didn't stop herself from looking up at him. He looked up from his food when she did that, catching her gaze. He pursed his lips and returned his attention to his meal. She frowned and went back to eating.

"I'm just going to go," Yahiko said, setting down his chopsticks to gesture in the direction of the dojo, "practice. I'll be waiting for you, Kaoru."

She nodded and let him leave though she didn't quite want to be left alone with Kenshin without a clue as to what to say. She set down her chopsticks, but before she could get out a word, the shoji slid open. "Ah, good, there's still food," Sano said excitedly as he walked in and sat down.

He served himself and began eating. Kaoru stared at him, unable to believe his timing. She looked over to Kenshin to see him giving her a similar look of incredulity. He gave her a small smile before looking back to Sano. She felt relieved, believing it meant that they were alright and that they would talk.

"What?" Sano asked Kenshin in response to his look before continuing to eat.

"What news do you have?" Kenshin asked, his seriousness apparent in his tone.

Sano stopped eating and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "Let's get a map, and I'll tell you what I know," he said, getting to his feet.

"We'll clean off the table then we'll bring it in here," Kaoru said, grabbing a handful of dishes before standing.

He frowned, "Fine."

The two men helped gather up the rest of the dishes and brought them into the kitchen to be cleaned. Kenshin enlisted Sano to help clean while Kaoru went in search of her most recent map of Tokyo. She arrived before they were finished, and cleaned off the table with a rag before helping them finish with the last of the dishes. Then, they entered the main room and gathered around the map.

"The police concluded that the attack wasn't aimed at the Akabeko," Sano said he laid out the map, "That it was a test or a misfiring of an illegally manufactured gun by dissatisfied samurai. But that's wrong. You can't count on those guys for anything."

"It's not their fault," Kenshin said, "They don't know the circumstances."

"What are the circumstances of jinchuu?" Kaoru asked.

Sano and Kenshin looked at her without offering any sort of answer. "Forgive me; I'm not well versed in revenge creed. What do those people intend to do by means of jinchuu?" she asked, clarifying her question.

Sano and Kenshin shared a look.

"Well?" she asked, directing her question at Kenshin, "How do they intend to punish you? Was targeting the Akabeko the warning or part of it?"

"Could be either, but lucky for us," Sano said, pointing at three different areas on the map, "Kenshin only hangs out around here, the Akabeko, and the Oguni Clinic. His being anti-social finally becomes handy."

"I'm aware," Kenshin said, giving Sano a bland look, "but did you really have to put it that way?"

"That's not all he does, though. He goes shopping and he talks to other people," she pointed out, "He's not a complete hermit."

"That doesn't make it any better," Kenshin said, giving her the same look he had given Sano, "but you do have a point."

"How do you know that?" Sano asked, "Are you keeping tabs on him or something?"

"No," she said, "I'm just with him a good portion of the time. He's talked to sellers, and he's been to Maekawa's dojo, too."

"I'm not sure I would attack those places or people if I were trying to get to me," Kenshin said, crossing his arms.

"They could attack pretty much any place in Tokyo and get to you," she noted.

"What makes you say that?" he asked, looking intently down at the map.

"Wait a second," Sano said, holding up a hand to stop their conversation, "Jo-chan, you just said you were with Kenshin most of the time, right?"

"Yeah," she said, wondering what he was getting at. She glanced over to Kenshin to see that he had paled, clearly having gotten whatever Sano was alluding to. She could feel her concern growing in her stomach.

"You spend a lot of time in the same places Kenshin does," he continued, starting to look genuinely worried.

"I do," she said, feeling the concern turn sharp, "You don't think…they're not targeting me to get to Kenshin, are they?"

She couldn't look over to Kenshin. She just hoped that wasn't so. "It's a possibility. He has been living with you for a while, and he's known you the longest out of all of us. We can't know for sure yet, but we should definitely be on guard for that," Sano said, nervousness in his voice.

Kaoru ran a hand over her forehead. She knew that targeting her would be a devastating blow to Kenshin. She didn't want him to suffer, and she didn't want to suffer either. She just wasn't sure how much she could do about that. They were after Kenshin and would most certainly be prepared to best him in a fight, or at least attempt it. It didn't seem like they had much of a chance of coming up on top of this jinchuu, provided they were targeting her.

"In any case, there aren't enough of us to cover everywhere or everyone Kenshin is in contact with," Sano said, breaking up the silence.

"What do we do then?" Kaoru asked.

"I don't know, keep on alert, do whatever we can," he said with a shrug, "hope they're not as good as we think they might be."

"What about Yahiko?" she asked, "Should we tell him? Tsubame-chan is also staying with us."

"We shouldn't worry them," Kenshin said quietly.

"What if they're blind-sided by an attack? Can we afford to let that happen?" she asked.

Kenshin and Sano shared another look. Obviously, this was where their logic in keeping them uninformed faltered. Yes, they wouldn't worry, but when they attack came, they would be unprepared and asking why. She'd rather worry than be ambushed without Kenshin or Sano there. She watched them as they slowly turned back to her, and she could see how close they'd become since their battle through Shishio's fortress.

"I don't want a repeat of the Aoiya," Kenshin said softly.

"The only reason the defense of the Aoiya went as well as it did was because we were prepared for the attack. You even told Hiko to prepare for it. The only way this could possibly be worse is if we didn't know about it and didn't prepare for it," she said, frowning, "It's a good thing I followed you onto Mt. Ueno otherwise you wouldn't have told me about this at all."

"I don't want you involved in this," he said, a strain developing in his tone. They were going to have a repeat. She didn't want to go through it again, but she would go through it as many times as necessary. It was that important.

"You're going to tell me that after last night? Why not? I took out as many of the Juppon Gatana as Sano did. I can defend myself and my home," she said, crossing her arms, "Besides, I might already be involved."

"I don't want you to get hurt," he said, now also frowning and the strain more apparent. He was holding out his hand, but it wasn't to placate her. He was motioning 'no'.

"But it's alright for you to nearly be killed?" she asked gruffly. Kenshin seemed to be without a verbal riposte for once, and he was clenching his jaw.

"This feels really odd to say, and I don't know what happened last night," Sano interjected, holding up his hands, "but I think that maybe we should take a break. Jo-chan, go tell Yahiko if you feel that's right."

"Fine," she grumbled and spared Kenshin one last glance before leaving the room. She took a deep breath as she walked from the room and released it slowly to calm herself. She entered the dojo to find Yahiko kneeling on the floor and waiting for her. She was surprised to see him prepared in such a manner. He hadn't hinted this at breakfast.

"Kaoru no shihandai!" he suddenly shouted at her, "From this day on, please hand down the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu succession techniques!"

"You want the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu succession techniques?" she asked, wondering where this has come from and feeling off balance, especially with her ongoing argument with Kenshin.

"Yes, I ask as if you were a man!" he continued, oblivious to her tone and expression.

The left over anger bubbled, and she bashed Yahiko over the head with her fist. It was perhaps a bit harsh, but she was furious. "I'm not a man! Ask me as the woman I am!" she yelled back at him.

"That doesn't make any sense!" he shouted, holding his hand over his injured head.

"You need to show me the same amount of respect you would if I were a man! I'm still your teacher, regardless of the fact that I'm a woman!" she returned, setting her fists on her hips.

"What does it matter?" he asked, "Just hurry up and tell me the techniques!"

"What makes you think I would with that attitude of yours?" she snapped, refusing to give in.

He collected himself then asked again, "Will you please teach me the succession techniques?"

"Not right now, Yahiko," she said, crossing her arms, "We need to talk."

"What do you mean!? I just asked you nicely and everything!" he shouted, gritting his teeth at her.

"Calm down!" she shouted back at him, trying to calm her own temper, "This isn't about the techniques. Something's happened."

"What's happened? Does it have to do with the Akabeko getting shot up?" he asked, his voice finally returned to normal volume.

"Yes, the gunner left a note," she said, running a hand down her arm and hoping the news wouldn't upset him too much, "We found it when we went to the mountain."

"What'd it say?"

"Jinchuu," she said, feeling like a heavy weight had settled in her chest as she spoke the word, "Someone or some people are out for revenge against Kenshin. We think they might attack people he knows and places he's been to. My dojo is included in that list."

"So what do we do?" he asked, looking up at her with his usual determination and an almost concealed amount of concern.

She grimaced. "I'm not sure. We didn't decide," she answered, finally taking a seat on the floor of the dojo.

"You didn't decide? Did you have a fight or something?" he asked, sitting down next to her.

"Yeah, we had an argument," she said, running her hand through her bangs before pushing them aside.

"With Kenshin?" he asked, sounding shocked, "You never fight with Kenshin. You didn't even fight when we found him in Kyoto. Is that why you two were weird this morning?"

"Yes, sort of, we argued over a couple things last night. We argued some more just now," she said with a sigh. Her student looked surprised and maybe even worried. She continued on, "Kenshin didn't want me to tell you about this."

"Why not?" he asked, betrayal peeking through in his expression.

"I'm not sure, but I am sure that he wouldn't have told me either if I hadn't been there on the mountain with them," she said, rolling her shoulders to lessen the tension she was starting to feel.

"And you got mad at him because you didn't agree?" he asked then tacked on, "Though I think he was wrong, too. I'm glad to know."

"Yes, I got mad at him, but that was only just now. Everyone has fights sometimes, even Kenshin and me. Sometimes, though, arguing can be a good thing," she said with a shrug, certain that nothing more could be added to that.

"This jinchuu," he started slowly before looking up at her, "This is really bad."

"Yeah, it is," she confirmed with a nod.

"But we'll be okay, right? Just like we were with Shishio," he said.

Kaoru wasn't sure what to say to him for a moment. He was looking at her the same way she had seen him look at Kenshin. There was a lot of trust there, and she was remembering just how young he was.

"We'll make it through this," she said, placing a hand on his shoulder, "We're all strong."

It wasn't an idealistic promise, an outright lie, or so she hoped, but something credible for him to believe in through whatever happened. He only nodded in response. They sat silently for a moment or two. "About the techniques, Yahiko," she said slowly, wondering if it was alright to be talking about it.

"Yeah?" he asked, sitting up straight and looking at her hopefully.

"Give me a day to decide. We all need to be prepared for this jinchuu, and the techniques could be a benefit. However, I really shouldn't be teaching you any of the techniques without the philosophy of the style," she explained, hoping he would be understanding and would respect whatever decision she'd make.

"But you already taught me the philosophy," he said, giving her a questioning look.

"I taught you part of it, yes," she conceded with a nod and a slight smile.

"Just how much is there to this philosophy?" he asked, his tone returning to normal.

"A lot," she said with a slight chuckle as she got to her feet, "You'd best keep practicing if you want to get through it all."

"I'm ready," he responded cockily, jumping to his feet.

"Good," she said with a nod, "Now, you can do a hundred swings."

He groaned, but set in on his task immediately. She pulled out her own bokken to practice as well. They would need to be as prepared as possible for this oncoming jinchuu.

* * *

I know I cut out the part where they discuss Yahiko's strength, but I think this is better. By telling Yahiko about jinchuu, Kaoru shows that she trusts he will be able to handle the information and act appropriately. She treats him more respectfully by doing this than Kenshin treats her or him in series. There were also a few things that I didn't like about this exchange in series. Mostly because she decides the hand down the techniques for basically the reasons she said she wouldn't. However, she would consider it as a matter of practicality having foreknowledge of jinchuu.

I feel bad for Kenshin because he so desperately doesn't want what happened to Tomoe to happen to Kaoru. However, Kaoru knows nothing about that, and she's legitimately able to act appropriately in a battle. He's not handling his concern for her in the best manner. I also think Sano would get really worried by Kenshin and Kaoru arguing and try to stop it or prevent it. I think he'd be aware that they're the center of their group, and he really doesn't want them to fall apart.

Now that that's all said, please review!


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry this is a little late. I had a bit of a writer's block for a while and lots of other things to do. Please enjoy!

* * *

Tsubame arrived at the dojo safely and in time for dinner. The meal itself was unusually quiet. Sano never turned up. Kaoru wasn't talking to Kenshin, and he wasn't talking to her. Yahiko had tried to start a conversation, but gave up a few minutes in. Tsubame seemed off put by the silence, but she didn't mention it.

Kaoru helped Kenshin clean up afterwards, leaving Yahiko occupy Tsubame. Kaoru caught herself glancing over to Kenshin as she worked. She couldn't tell if he was still upset, and she didn't know what to say to him, to fix it. She wondered if it was better to ignore their argument for now or to speak of it outright.

"Do you think something will happen tonight?" she asked, finally getting the courage to say something.

"Most likely," he said, not looking at her.

"You're not going to sleep tonight," she said, stacking and putting away the cleaned dishes.

"No," he responded, handing her the last of the dishes.

She raised her eyebrows, surprised that he was being honest with her now. She decided it was best not to push her luck with this improvement and left the conversation there. They finished the dishes together silently. She was half tempted to ask him to spar with her again, but she remembered she had something more pressing to attend to. She excused herself from Kenshin's presence and left to check on Tsubame and Yahiko.

She found the two children sitting on the engawa talking to each other. She made sure not to eavesdrop on their conversation and slipped past them to check on the guest room she had made up for Tsubame. Everything was in its place. "Tsubame?" she asked as she came by them again.

"Yes?" she asked, turning away from her conversation with Yahiko to speak with her.

"Everything is ready for you. Let me know if you need anything," she said then added, "I want both of you in bed around sundown."

Tsubame nodded immediately, but Yahiko regarded her with a cautious look before nodding as well. He was also thinking that something would happen that night. "Good night," she told them before heading to her room and the matter of importance.

Tucked away into a corner of her room was a cheaply made box covered in dust. She gingerly brushed the dirt from its lid before opening it. Stored inside of it were many mementoes from her father. The most valuable of them was the book she had never read. She pulled it from where she had tucked it away by its spine. She closed the box then settled herself to read.

She opened the cover for the first time to see her father's handwriting on the page. He had written no forward to her, having given her that message with his voice before he'd left. His first words were concerning the first of the succession techniques that were necessary for her to know to become a master of Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. She hadn't looked at his handwriting in so long, but it was still so familiar. The words on the page were read to her in her head by his voice. It was so faint compared to what it had been, but she hadn't thought of his voice recently at all.

She breathed in deep, placing a hand over her mouth, and attempted to quell the ache in her chest at the thought of her father. After a moment, she pulled her hand from her mouth to use her fingers to trace the characters he had written. Then she began to really read and take in the words and what they were telling her. His tone was the formal one he had used to teach her and his other pupils. The motions were described the same way he had always used to described them before giving a demonstration. She knew exactly what he meant and could clearly imagine him performing them; making her think that perhaps she had seen him making those motions without realizing what they were.

When the sun went down she set aside the book for a moment to check on Tsubame and Yahiko. They had both gone to their respective rooms, and nothing seemed out of place. Kenshin wasn't in view, and she decided to return to her father's book. She lit the lamp in her room, hoping she wouldn't bother anyone else in the house, and settled herself. This time she knew it would be for however long it would take for something to happen.

She found herself absorbed in her reading. The techniques were a clear completion of the style, the finishing details of a work of art in motion. Her father's philosophy and logic was tucked away inside every movement. He was explaining things to her again and it made sense. It was easy to learn, and everything had been hard recently.

She was having an argument with Kenshin, and she didn't know what to do about that. It was all just after welcoming him home, having the dojo be home rather than some place that she happened to live in. It had almost scared her how easy it had been for her to leave the house she had grown up in to travel to Kyoto after getting over Kenshin leaving her.

Then there was the reason she was even touching this book. This jinchuu had upended everything all over again. The thought that someone could die was a leaden shroud around her shoulders, and the discomfort it brought kept reminding that she had to continue reading. She couldn't allow these people in her home to die, not so soon after finding them, not at all.

She wasn't certain how long she read for, but she heard a bang after a considerable amount of time had passed. She knew from the timbre of the noise that it was coming from the front gate. She leapt to her feet, replaced her book with a bokken, and ran out towards the gate. Kenshin was already there, and Yahiko was just behind her. "Stop!" Kenshin commanded whoever was on the other side, "Back away slowly!"

"Please…open the gate," a weakened voice cried out to them, "If you don't…the Maekawa dojo will be…"

Kaoru felt like ice had been dropped down her spine. "We have to open the gate," she said, immediately moving towards it. Kenshin and Yahiko followed her out once she had it open. Outside was one of the students she had taught, beaten and bloody. Her stomach became unsettled. "Come in, sit down," she commanded him, taking hold of his shoulders and guiding him inside the walls of her dojo.

She made him sit down so that he could rest against the wall while she prepared to bandage his wounds. "What happened?" Yahiko asked, kneeling beside her, "Someone challenge the dojo?"

"No," he responded, shaking his head slowly, "he meant to kill. I ran to the police, but they couldn't help."

She watched as the student reached out towards Kenshin and continued to speak, "If he keeps going he'll kill them all."

"Kenshin," she said sternly as he turned to run for the other dojo.

"I'm coming too!" Yahikio shouted as he got to his feet.

"Stay here!" he yelled back at him, "Bar the door and keep watch! I'll be back by morning."

"Kenshin!" she shouted as he was moving again, torn between knocking some sense into him and helping the student. He couldn't just shout at them or run off like that. She swallowed her aggravation and returned to tending the student.

"Yahiko, please shut the gate," she told him as she checked the man's wounds for any sort of dirt or debris. There was surprisingly little, but she chose to accept that as a small mercy and began binding the worst of his wounds. When she finished she assured him he was fine for now, but should see a doctor in the morning.

"Thank you, Kamiya-san," he said sincerely, giving her a smile laced with pain.

"You're welcome, it was nothing," she told him, getting to her feet, "Can you walk? It'll be better if I get you inside."

"I think so," he said with a nod, "I made it all the way here."

"Alright, just move slowly, and use the wall for support," she said gently. She kept a careful eye on him and his balance as he got to his feet, one of his hands on the wall at all times. Once he was upright he gave her a nod.

"Good, I'll help you get inside and I'll set you up with a futon for tonight," she said, moving towards him to give him some help. She put his arm over her shoulders, barely tall enough to be a crutch for him. He was a bit heavier than she had expected, but not too bad.

"Thank you," he said again, "You're much too kind."

"I couldn't do anything less than this," she said, guiding him with slow steps to the main room of the house. There were no bedrooms left and it was too late to try and rearrange the shoji to give him his own place to sleep. "Though I would prefer to get you a doctor now, but it's not safe with these attacks."

"I understand," he said, short of breath from the effort of walking. It was a hassle getting him up the steps, and Kaoru was merely glad they hadn't fallen over in the process. She helped him sit then rushed out to collect an extra futon for him. It was worn and thin and not something she would have liked to give a guest, but she didn't have any other choice. She brought it back to the main room, set it beside the student, and prepared it for him to sleep in.

"I can do it from here," he told her when she moved to help him onto the futon, "I'll just rest."

"Alright," she said, watching carefully as he winced while shifting himself onto the bed, "I'll check on you in the morning then."

"Thank you," he called to her again as she left the room.

"You're welcome," she said before shutting the shoji to give him privacy as he slept. Hopefully, if they were attacking the Maekawa dojo, they wouldn't be coming here. She turned around to find Yahiko still standing guard at the gate.

"Yahiko," she called out to him as she descended the steps. He didn't turn to face her. She walked over to him to check if he was alright. He looked upset as she feared he would be.

"Are you alright?" she asked, putting a hand on his tense shoulder.

"I'm fine," he said, his words coming out like a sigh and his shoulders dropping, "but I don't like this."

"I don't like it either," she said, glancing at the gate and wondering what was happening outside of it.

"Not jinchuu, it's bad, but I hate getting left behind all the time," he said, his tone bitter, "I don't like being weak."

"You're not weak," she assured him, rubbing his shoulder, "You only have limits, the same as the rest of us."

"Then why am I left behind?" he asked, looking up at her with anger still in his eyes.

"In case you haven't noticed, I've been left too," she said, making sure to look him in the eyes, "That doesn't make us weak. There will likely always be someone stronger than us or believes they are better than us because they can kill. That doesn't mean they actually are better than us. There are some things more important than physical strength. Do not stress yourself over being unable to fight on Kenshin's level. You're being unfair to yourself."

"How are you okay with that? With not fighting alongside Kenshin?" he asked, still worked up.

"You must understand that we cannot fail. We are protectors not fighters. I could never fight Kenshin's battles if it meant that I or the one I protect dies. Our goal isn't to win battles; it's to prevent people from being killed. Whoever is capable of success fights that battle," she explained, keeping her enunciation sharp and clear and her tone gentle.

"I don't get it. If you're going to fight then you need to be strong, and it's good to be strong, right?" he asked, looking down and away from her.

"Strength is an asset, a tool. It is neither good nor bad, merely something you use," she said, wondering what more she needed him to know to understand, "It's alright to be strong, but it's not for your personal pride. It is for you to use to aid others, and that is an endless task."

"I figured as much," he said, frowning.

"It's time for bed Yahiko," she told him, "We'll see Kenshin in the morning."

"But what about keeping watch?" he asked despite moving with her towards the house.

"I'll do that, but I doubt more attacks will be made tonight," she assured him. She made sure he went to bed and got some sleep. He was still young. Regardless of what she had told him, and that she could be right; she didn't go back to her room. She sat on the edge of the engawa nearest the front gate, crossing her legs and placing her bokken across them. She sat there all night waiting for sunrise, too anxious to think of sleep.

The sun came up, Tsubame and Yahiko woke, she was exhausted, and neither Kenshin nor Sano had returned to the dojo.

* * *

Alright, I honestly had no idea what to do with the student from Maekawa's dojo. He's injured enough for Kaoru to start bandaging him immediately then he disappears. Anyways, this chapter continues with my grievances of Watsuki's failure with both Kaoru and Yahiko. Did Kaoru really not notice that Yahiko hadn't gone to bed after Kenshin ran off in the manga? She was definitely the better option to stand guard, and I'm certain she'd be too worried about her boys to fall asleep.

This is chapter is basically what I think she should have told Yahiko instead of what she did say to him in the manga plus allowing him to learn the succession techniques. I think Yahiko admired the quality of physical strength a little too much and was perhaps jealous of Kenshin's and Sano's ability to fight. To add to that, he wanted the physical strength in order to be respected by those two men. Instead, those two men should have respected him regardless of his age and his comparative lack of physical strength.

I think Kaoru, on the other hand, would have had a history of watching her father fight the battles she wanted in on so she'd be better able to handle Kenshin and Sano (though she took it way too far in the manga and pretty much stopped fighting period). I'm pretty sure I'm turning Kaoru's father into a superhero mentor.

Please review!


	6. Chapter 6

So I'm still technically a little behind on this. Two weeks might have been a bit ambitious.

* * *

The first thing Kaoru did was send the student off to a doctor. He was better than he had been the night before, well enough to walk at least, but she wanted to be certain that he was healing properly and would continue to do so. She then helped Tsubame with her bed head, combing her hair until it lay flat again. She asked about what was going on, and Kaoru told her the truth about jinchuu. Then the girl asked about Kenshin, and she told her she'd rather not discuss that. She recruited Yahiko to help her cook and neither did a very good job, burning a fair portion of whatever they cooked. They had to eat it anyways as still neither Kenshin nor Sano had returned.

During clean up, she spared herself a moment to release some of her exhaustion in privacy. She put her weight on her forearms, leaning on the counter, and bending one leg then the other. She dropped her head and closed her eyes and breathed deeply for several moments. She pushed back her bangs then ran her hand over her face and across the back of her neck. She rolled her shoulders then stood up straight again. Once she finished the dishes, Sano arrived with Megumi in tow.

She came outside to greet them. He looked around for a moment then back at her. "Kenshin's not back?" he asked.

She shook her head. "So I dragged the medicine chest all the way out here for nothing," he groused, and Megumi shot him a harsh glare, "Well no point in worrying. I doubt they'd be able to beat him."

"Yeah," Kaoru agreed quietly, just hoping he would show up. She hadn't liked the way he'd ran off, but she wanted him back home safe.

"By the way," Sano said as he jerked his thumb towards the dojo's wall, "I brought you a trophy."

She turned to look and was surprised to see a chubby man knocked out cold. "That's one of the Juppon Gatana, isn't it?" she asked, trying to think of all the implications his appearance held.

"It looks like it, doesn't it?" Sano said, focusing on the body and rubbing his chin, "It fits exactly with what we know about him. Our enemy must have had relations with Shishio, or maybe just wants us to think he had relations with Shishio."

"What is going on?" Megumi snapped at him, "Did you hurt yourself in a fight and not an accident?"

Sano winced. "Spit it out!" she shouted, moving to beat him over the head with her medicine chest.

"You didn't tell her?" Kaoru asked, incredulous that he would do something so stupid.

"I didn't have time to explain everything to her!" he said in defense while he wrestled her for control of the chest, "I'll tell her when Kenshin gets back!"

"Kaoru-san!" Tsubame interrupted, coming around the corner of the building towards them, "Kenshin-san is back, but…"

She trailed off as they all caught sight of Kenshin. Kaoru drew in a sharp breath. His bangs were covering his face, his shoulders hunched, and his clothes seemed to be covered in ash. He walked slowly and didn't raise his head as he came nearer to them. "Hey, Ken-," Sano began, but she held up a hand to cut him off.

"Welcome back, Kenshin," she told him gently, "Are you alright?"

It took him a moment to respond and when he did, he still didn't raise his head. "I'm not injured, but I need a nap," he said, his voice hoarse.

"Alright, we'll be here," she told him as they let him pass. She watched him carefully as he headed towards his room. His gait was steady, but still unusually slow.

"What happened to him?" Tsubame asked, "Why didn't you ask him about anything?"

"I couldn't," she said, turning towards the rest of the group, "Something happened, and it must have hurt him. He's suffering now. If sleep helps, I'm not going to bother him."

The other three looked at her with disheartened expressions. "What did I miss?" Yahiko asked as he appeared around the corner.

"Kenshin's back, but he needs to rest," Kaoru told him.

"He's fine though right?" he asked, concern in his expression.

"He's not hurt, but something's bothering him," she said then shook her head, "but we can't worry about that now. We have other things to discuss."

"Like what?" he asked.

"The succession techniques," she answered him before turning back to the other three, "There are some things I'd like to discuss with Yahiko alone so I'd prefer it if you stayed away from the dojo for a while. You're welcome to use the kitchen or the main room."

They all nodded, and Kaoru turned to Yahiko. She motioned for him to follow her. She led him into the dojo and made sure all the shoji were closed before she motioned for him to take a seat with her.

"So, you've made a decision?" he asked hopefully when she didn't say anything immediately.

"Yahiko, I mean no offense, but I do not want to teach you the succession techniques. I have not taught you nearly enough of the philosophy to be handing down those techniques," she told him plainly, making certain to look him in the eye, "but these are unusual circumstances. I will teach you the first of the techniques and that one only. I will skip all of that philosophy, but do not think you won't have to learn it all eventually."

"I'm not good enough?" he asked with a frown.

"No, you're not ready. There's a difference. You can't ask a caterpillar to fly any more than you can expect a new student to be able to perform final techniques. There is a time for certain things, and this jinchuu is rushing everything. I want to be able to teach you at your pace and have you understand everything, not have the pace be set by enemies," she explained, willing him to understand.

She was too tired and desperate to make mistakes. She had never really tried to teach someone like this before. All the former students had learned most of the philosophy from her father before he'd left. It had been trying enough to teach him from scratch, and jinchuu was starting to squeeze every last ounce of her beliefs and teaching abilities out of her.

"So you wouldn't be teaching me if not for jinchuu," he said morosely, folding his arms over his chest.

"It's not like that, Yahiko. You would have learned it eventually, but when you were ready. Not because I thought you might get killed if you didn't know," she said, running a hand over her face.

When she pulled her hand away, she saw Yahiko staring at her in shock. She knew she had made a misstep then. She sighed and squared her shoulders, "I didn't mean to say it like that. I apologize for that, but . . . these people, whoever they may be, are likely war criminals. They won't spare you because you're a child. This isn't some test, and you must not try to fight. If something happens to Kenshin, Sano, Megumi, and me, you will run and protect Tsubame. You will only use this technique if they attack you before you can get away."

"What? Don't talk like that," he said, sounding afraid and pulling away from her.

"I'm sorry Yahiko, but I want you to be prepared for the worst case scenario," she said calmly, hoping that forcing some sort of serenity out of herself would placate him.

"Kenshin won't lose. He'd never lose," he said, shaking his head.

"I don't believe he will lose, but I won't act like he can't die," she said with a sigh, "He's going to need all of our help, and I want you to help by making sure that Tsubame stays safe."

"That's fine, I can do that, but I can't just leave you," he said, holding out his hands towards her to motion just what he meant by 'you'.

"Only as a last resort," she told him, "I have to make sure you and Tsubame make it through this."

"But what about you?" he implored her, leaning in closer to her.

"We'll be fine," she told him firmly, "I just want you to be prepared."

"Alright," he said, lowering his head and sounding like he only half believed her.

"Let's get started on this technique then, shall we?" she asked lightly, rising to her feet and relieved that that terrible conversation was over. She took down a shinai and then went to the center of the room. She turned around to see he had followed her and had pulled out his shinai.

"The Kamiya Kasshin Ryu ougi are going to be very different from what you've learned so far. They're all based on the hilt, and they're designed to control your opponent," she explained, tapping her fingers on the hilt of her shinai.

"Control?" he asked while looking at the hilt of his shinai.

"Yes, if the goal isn't to kill, the only other option is to control. You force them to surrender as soon as possible to minimize injuries. If not, you must make them stop," she said, taking a deep breath when she finished.

"That sounds brutal," he admitted, giving her a weak smile.

"It's better than death," she said, returning an equally weak smile. They were in no shape to be discussing this, but they had no choice. She wanted to give Yahiko every chance she could.

She took a stance and motioned for him to do the same, "I'm going to demonstrate a strike using the hilt a few times then I want you to repeat it."

She raised her arms and brought them down again in a clean strike onto his shinai. She completed the movements slowly and smoothly so he could see how she was moving. After repeating it a few times, she brought her shinai back into a defensive position. Yahiko did his best to repeat the motion against her weapon.

"No, you're relying on the whole blade," she said, shaking her head, "Try again."

He did, and she shook her head. He tried again and again, receiving one head shake after another. She repeated the demonstration, and he still got it wrong when he tried to copy her. "I know it feels a little different than what you're used to, but you have to focus on using the hilt," she said, starting to nudge the edge of her patience.

"I'm trying!" he shouted, smacking his shinai against hers again.

She shook her head then she heard the shoji open. She turned around and spotted her redheaded housemate, "Kenshin."

"Kaoru-dono, Yahiko, what are you doing?" he asked, looking wide eyed at them and almost back to normal. He had dried blood down the side of his face, but he didn't seem to realize that it was there.

"I'm trying to teach Yahiko the first succession technique," she said then turned to Yahiko to motion that he could take a break for the moment. She needed to talk to Kenshin and maybe clean him up a bit.

"Oh," he said, then more quietly when she came near, "Isn't he a little young?"

"Isn't he a little young for jinchuu?" she asked in response, pulling a towel off a stack she kept ready for anything in the dojo. He winced. She continued, unfolding the towel as she spoke, "It's not your fault, but I'm not taking chances."

He fell back against the wall of the dojo, his head lowered. "There's something I need to talk to you about, and with everyone else," he said.

She closed her eyes for a moment. "But first," she said, looking at him and holding towel out towards him, "Are you alright? Megumi should check you out before you tell us anything, right?"

She moved to wipe the blood off his face, but stopped when he said, "Thank you, Kaoru-dono."

"Huh?" she reared back slightly then felt his hand on her wrist, not sure what he was doing, "Kenshin?"

"This warmth is not an illusion, it's real," he said almost in a whisper before gripping her wrist just a little tighter, "There's something I must tell you all about this battle, from the beginning."

"That's fine, Kenshin, but right now, you've got blood on your face and you look like you could use a little more rest," she said, watching his expression as she spoke, "Let me clean you up."

"Alright," he consented, nodding his head.

"Yahiko, keep practicing the strike I taught you," she said to him quickly before bringing Kenshin outside to the well where she knew there was always a bucket of water.

"Take a seat," she said, motioning for him to sit on the wall of the well by the bucket. He sat down, and she tilted up his head with a hand under his chin. She began to gently brush off the worst of the dried blood and was extra careful around the cut just above his eyebrow and another at his hairline. He kept his right eye open, but scrunched his left eye shut. It made it hard to clean off the blood.

"Don't scrunch up your eye," she told him as she dipped the towel in the clean water, "or I won't be able to get all the blood off."

"Sorry," he said sheepishly, giving her a small smile and relaxing the eye while keeping it closed. She wiped the blood off his forehead first then his cheek. She tackled all the dried blood in his eyebrow hair while carefully avoiding the forming scab. She swiped a new section of the towel gently over his eyelid until it was clean as well. She flipped the towel upside down and dried his face while wiping away the last of the blood.

"There," she said, pulling her hands away.

He opened up his eye, and responded, "Thank you."

"It's no trouble, Kenshin," she told him as she stood upright and began to fold the towel.

"I'll clean that," he said, holding out his hand for the towel and offering a small smile.

"Alright, thanks," she said, handing it over to him, "You'll tell us later?"

"Yes, tonight," he said with a nod.

"I'll go back and help Yahiko then," she said, and when he didn't respond she began to walk back to the dojo. She glanced over her shoulder at him to see him watching her go with a closed and dampened expression. She didn't know what to think of that and continued on to the dojo.

* * *

First things first, I don't think Kaoru would be big on all nighters so I'm certain she's really tired and sleep deprived. She didn't handle the conversation with Yahiko in the best of manners though I do think the manga didn't treat him right in regards to the danger jinchuu presented. I honestly think that Kaoru would have done something like this; give Yahiko the job of protecting Tsubame and essentially doing all she can to ensure he survives. I think more than anything she'd want him to survive as he is still only ten. I'm also playing with an idea of her telling him about what Kenshin saved her from. Also, Kaoru's so worried and tired by the time Kenshin gets around to talking to her that she doesn't reprimand him and wants to make sure he's okay (and I give you fluffy-ish stuff to make up for their fighting).

Kenshin's story gets its own chapter because it so needs it. There was no way I was going to start in this one to continue in the next one or anything like that.

I hope you enjoyed, but here's a bit of bad news. I'm going off to college for the summer, and I don't know what to expect. This means that I might be going on hiatus. If you don't get a new chapter in about two weeks its because of that. If that happens, I'll try to make it up to you in August. Please review!


	7. Chapter 7

I'm sorry this is kind of late, and also a bit short. I'm also going to go ahead and switch to a monthly updating schedule, and I'll try to update in the middle of every month.

* * *

Kaoru was nervous and fidgeting with the hem of her kimono's sleeve. It was her first time wearing one since returning from Kyoto, and it felt unusually awkward to wear. She was sitting with Kenshin on the engawa and Yahiko and Tsubame had taken seats to flank them. They were waiting for Sano and Megumi to return for Kenshin to begin with his story. She wasn't certain if she truly wanted to listen to his story, but she would listen no matter what he shared.

Sano and Megumi quietly took seats and Kenshin took a deep breath. "On my way home this morning, I received a declaration of war from the mastermind behind jinchuu. He told me that ten days from now he would attack this dojo with all of his forces. His name is Yukishiro Enishi, and he's my brother."

"Your brother?" Sano choked out while the rest of them were still gasping from the new information.

"Well, more accurately, my brother-in-law," Kenshin amended. "The brother of Himura Tomoe, the wife I killed with my own hands."

Kaoru had thought of many terrible circumstances surrounding Kenshin's connection to the perpetrator of jinchuu, but this had not been one of them. She could only stare at him wide eyed as she struggled to find something, anything to say to him. He plowed on to tell the beginning of his story towards the start of his career as a hitokiri, saying the words like he knew that if he stopped he would not be able to begin again.

He faltered occasionally over descriptions of how cold-hearted he had been during assassinations and his attempts at washing away all of the blood. It was shocking to hear the difference between his first 'rescue' of a woman, Tomoe, and how he had rescued Kaoru. She would have turned him away had he rained blood inside of her dojo. Worst of all were the parts where he described his actions and it sounded like him, or at least the parts of him he played up during this time of peace. For her, it cemented that this story was one that Kenshin had lived through. Kenshin's voice eventually began to edge upon becoming hoarse, and his words slowed as he came to tell them of the start of his life with Tomoe when he was fifteen.

When he paused, Megumi asked, "Kenshin?"

"Let me catch my breath," he answered.

"Yeah," Yahiko agreed.

"He has been talking for three hours," Sano added.

After several moments of silence, Tsubame spoke up, "I'll, uh, go get more tea."

"You shouldn't have to do that on your own," Megumi said as she stood. "I'll help you."

"Oh, thank you," she said timidly.

As they began to move towards the kitchen, Sano said, "I'll go get the snacks."

"Why do you know where the snacks are?" Yahiko asked grouchily, but nonetheless followed the man towards where Kaoru had stashed them.

When they had all left, she turned to Kenshin. He was watching her, waiting for her to pass judgment. She had meant it when she had said that she hadn't cared about his past and that she had invited the rurouni to stay. That was what he had needed to hear and all she had had to say. Now that he had shared his past, however, there was more for her to say.

"I can't say I'm surprised," she said, thinking of flames that had recently been rekindled. "At fourteen, I was angry enough to fight a war as well."

She thought he looked surprised, but his expression was dampened by his exhaustion. "You would have fought a war?" he asked, his tone suggesting caution.

"I didn't have a war front to join though and had to settle for breaking Ito Minoru's jaw and nose," she said, and rubbed her chin before continuing, "with my fists."

His eyebrows rose. "What did he do to deserve that?"

"He couldn't accept that he had been beaten fairly by a woman. He didn't have a very high opinion of women in general. He had no such trouble with men," she said, knowing she had admitted the crux of the problem she had struggled with her entire life. She could only be accepted as a fighter if she denied her gender, but it meant so much for her to be a woman who could fight. She couldn't deny who and what she was, and she wouldn't ever give it up or surrender it.

She turned back to Kenshin to see that he was frowning. "That almost seems reasonable," he said.

She knew they were now discussing at what point pacifism should be breached. "Almost as reasonable as killing men for supporting those who would squish the people beneath them."

She watched him wince. "I'm sorry," she said with a sigh, emotion heavy on her tongue. "You did as you felt you needed to. Despite your actions, your intentions were…maybe a little short sighted, but not bad. Better than those of most of the people I've met. But you have to understand, the war you fought, it…it wasn't fought for me. This may be a time of peace, but this is not a time of contentment. Not for me, not for any woman like me, without even going into all those who have been displaced by the change your war brought."

"My war?" he asked.

"Yes, you fought it,"

He ran his hand through his hair. He sighed and looked at her with tired eyes, "I saw that as soon as I began wandering. I…regretted joining the war effort more and more each day so I never stopped to ask anyone. I think it would have only made…me worse. I can't…I can only keep the peace."

"I'm not asking you to do anything, Kenshin," she said, cautiously placing her hand lightly on his shoulder. "I'm just letting you know that I have my own story."

"Will you tell me it?" he asked, not moving away from her hand in the slightest.

"Yes," she told him, giving him a slight squeeze. "When this is all over."

He nodded as Yahiko came back into view, and she quickly withdrew her hand. Everyone was silent as they returned to their seats. "Let's start again," Sano said once he was in position.

Kaoru straightened her back, preparing herself for what was to come. "Kenshin, please tell us the rest."

"Very well," he said, taking another deep breath, "I'll continue."

Hearing the first half of his story had been terrible enough. Learning that he'd had a few months of happiness only for it to be torn brutally away from him, how he'd violently chased after it, and accidently destroyed the last of it himself. Then he'd had to go back to war. It was painful just to listen to, and she had no idea how he'd survived it. At least he had. He could have been done away with as they'd attempted to do with Shihsio. Then he never would have gotten a chance to find happiness again. She hoped he was finding it here.

No one spoke when he finished telling his story. After a few moments, Kenshin stood with his tea cup in hand. "I'll clean these."

"I'll help," Kaoru said. She figured, now that she knew his story, that cleaning was the best way he knew how to calm himself.

They collected the cups from their friends and headed towards the kitchen. She could hear them talk quietly amongst themselves as Sano prepared to leave, and Tsubame and Megumi discussed getting out another futon for the doctor to spend the night. Kaoru let Kenshin wash all of the dishes, and she dried them when he finished. They both put the dishes away.

"Kenshin?" Kaoru asked as he was leaving. She was already blaming the lateness of the hour for this foolish idea.

"Yes?"

"Can I," she began before floundering for words. "Can I just…"

She was too flustered to ask him plainly, and he was giving her a look of confusion. She sighed then held her arms open and out towards him, hoping he would now understand her meaning. "Is this alright?"

"It's fine," he said quietly, stepping towards her. She wrapped her arms around his waist, and he returned the hug. They swayed for a moment before finding a balance. She ran a hand up and down his back, hoping he could take all the comfort he needed from this.

It was so very different from their farewell. He wasn't crushing her, and she felt no pain. She didn't want to let him go now that she was realizing how touch starved she had been. How much longer had he gone without this sort of contact? She squeezed him then realized that the action had likely caused her to cross a boundary she shouldn't have.

He tightened his grip on her instead of pulling away. He let his head drop onto her shoulder, and she tilted her head so that it rested against his. Then he released her, and she withdrew. She didn't know what to do with her hands, and she was certain she was flushed. She chanced a glance at his expression. He looked exhausted and wrung out.

"You should sleep," she told him.

"I should," he agreed, wiping his hand down the cheek with the scar.

"Goodnight, Kenshin,"

"Goodnight," he said, then shuffled his feet. "And thank you, Kaoru-dono."

"You're welcome. Please, sleep well."

He nodded then finally moved his feet to leave. She reluctantly parted ways with him.

There was light still coming from her room, and when she entered she saw that Megumi and Tsubame were finishing settling in for the night. She quickly changed into her sleepwear. She checked that her guests were settled before blowing out the lamp and laying down on her futon in the dark.

She couldn't sleep. There were too many thoughts jumbled in her head. What did it mean that Kenshin had shared his story with them? That history was relevant to understanding jinchuu, but he could have hidden it if he had wanted too. She kept still and breathed deeply, hoping it would be enough.

She heard the covers being moved. She rolled over to see Tsubame sitting up. "Can't sleep?" she asked.

Tsubame snapped her head towards her, but didn't say anything.

"I'm sorry you had to be involved in this," Kaoru said. "It must be frightening."

"It's not that," Tsubame said, shaking her head. "It's just, it's so sad, what happened to Kenshin-san and Tomoe-san."

"I wonder if you should feel sorry for Tomoe-san," Megumi said, joining the conversation. "She died protecting the one she loved. She literally loved him until the day she died. That's not bad at all. Had I been in her place, I would have done the same without a second thought."

"Maybe," Kaoru conceded. "But her fate was sad. She ended up in that situation though because she was intending to kill someone. They both did."

"Are you saying you think they deserved what happened because of their intentions and actions?" Megumi asked, turning to face Kaoru.

"No, absolutely not, no one deserves death or to have their loved one die in such a manner. It's just another example of killing and revenge doing more harm than good," she said tiredly, and ran a hand across her forehead, "I can't agree with either of their actions. I could have never done it."

Megumi sat up. "You wouldn't even sacrifice yourself to save the one you love?"

"I think it's better to live for them, don't you agree? Help them survive? I'm not Tomoe-san. I don't have to throw my body in front of a blade to protect another. I have my own skills, and it would be incredibly foolish for me to repeat her actions," she snapped. "Don't act like I'd ever be in the same position as her."

"Yes," Megumi said wryly, "You're certainly no substitute."

"What?" Tsubame asked quietly, breaking up the women's conversation.

"It's nothing," Kaoru told her, settling back down onto her bed. "We all should sleep."

She heard the other two move around for someone time, but eventually they stilled. She fell asleep soon after; her thoughts playing havoc with her dreams.

* * *

There are actually a lot of things I have against this section of the manga. First and foremost that Tomoe was fridged because she's pretty badass.

I don't like that he cut away from Kenshin and Kaoru during the intermission. You don't do that to the main character and their love interest. Whatever they could have said likely would have been much more interesting than what the others talked about. It makes it convenient for me to put in whatever I want, but it's still kinda poor story telling on Watsuki's part. I also didn't like that everyone totally left Kenshin alone after telling his story. He was already emotionally struggling before he started telling it, he definitely would be an emotional wreck afterwards. I don't think any one of the characters would have let him be alone immediately after without at least offering some sort of comfort. Kenshin's got a support group that would willingly help him and care for him. That was the whole point of him sticking around at the dojo. That's supposed to be the difference between wandering and staying. Why wouldn't you use that?

(I also think a little more attention should have been paid to the fact that Kenshin had some really high hopes for outcome of the war, and they weren't exactly met. Not to the extent he would have liked.)

Lastly, really didn't like the comparisons made between Kaoru and Tomoe. Kaoru would never under any circumstances been in Tomoe's position because she would not have started a vendetta against anyone. She definitely should have called out Tomoe and Kenshin's actions/intentions (no excusing attempting to kill someone or actually killing someone). Not only that, her conversation with Megumi made it seem like she **would have to take the same route Tomoe did as if she didn't have any fighting skills** that could totally help her out in that situation. Way to forget something about a character.

So yeah, disappointed with the manga there. I apologize if this is not up to snuff because I do kinda need to get back into writing (especially writing RK). Please review! (Also, if anyone has a better idea for a generic Japanese name for Kaoru's adversary, I'm all for hearing about it)


End file.
